5 Healthy Communication Habits: before you move in with your significant other

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Living with someone can be ROUGH! I have been with my significant other for almost 3 years. It’s all rosy at first, ya know when you are deciding where to put all of your decor and clearing out room in the closet for some of their clothes, but I’m telling you..

Once that honeymoon stage wears off, you’ll wish you knew this: COMMUNICATE!

Communicate about things that bug you before they blow up.

You’ve heard it a million times and you’ll hear it again: The health of any relationship depends on how well each partner communicates. Every couple has their own way to communicate effectively with one another, and how you approach this can impact everything from letting your partner you’re annoyed that they forgot to take out the trash (again) to how you approach bigger-picture issues like finances and major life changes.

Is the issue worth bringing up?

Is this the right time to have the conversation?

How will you say what you need to say? 

Don’t be discouraged if you and your partner haven’t found the right way to communicate yet — this work takes time and healthy communication can come in many forms.

Plan dates together — even if you already have dinner together every night.

You have to work hard at relationships, and part of that is planning your date nights. From going out for a picnic to even going to a late-night movie, planning a date shows that you both will take time for each other. You can even set parameters such as no work talk if you want to. The point is to use the day — or even just a few hours — to enjoy each other’s company.

Try one hour of “no technology” every night.

No matter how hard it may seem, having one hour without technology at some point of your day may help you focus on the other person — how often have you each been scrolling your own devices while being in the same room, and not actually enjoying each other’s company? And honestly, I wish I followed this tip sooner, as it may have helped me avoid so many fights.

Try each other’s hobbies.

A lot of couples try new hobbies together, but consider trying each other’s hobbies first. You may despise the idea of wanting to learn to skateboard, and they may hate the idea of wanting to get crafty. But showing an interest in what the other person is doing, even if it’s a quiet time in another corner of your home, shows an interest in who they are as people — and this can help them feel seen and supported.

Don’t confuse stability with boredom.

Raise your hand if you’ve ever been suspicious that things are “too quiet” or going “too well.” Being constantly afraid that the other shoe is about to drop is exhausting, and, well, you know what they say about self-fulfilling prophecies. Just because things are lowkey in your relationship, doesn’t mean that your relationship is stale. As Tennesha Wood, a dating coach, matchmaker, and founder of The Broom List tells Apartment Therapy, a stable relationship is one built off of trust, and sometimes just because there are down periods doesn’t mean you’re not growing together.