Simple Simon

A woman in West Virginia was arrested for felony burglary . . . after breaking into a home . . . in a chicken coop . . . where two HUMANS were living. The intruder was also stabbed by the woman who lived there.

A drug dealer in Florida saw the cops closing in on him, and RIGHT at that moment, he got pegged in the head by a flying bag of cocaine, which was "returned" by the man he'd just sold it to.

A Chattanooga man is facing several charges after leading local law enforcement on a chase on an ATV. Not only did he crash the ATV he then crashed out on police as they were trying to arrest him.

As if TSA doesn't have enough issues.....A 58-year-old drunk man in Florida drove through a gate at Daytona Beach Airport and onto the airfield. He almost collided with a plane, and then he jumped out and tried to board several aircraft. He was arrested.

A California driver was cited after using an empty jacket to impersonate a passenger in a Los Angeles County carpool lane.

Police in Washington state arrested a man and a woman who stole a vehicle last week. The woman freaked out on the cops, because she was worried about her pet kitten, which she brought along for the crime.

A 32-year-old man from Florida was pulled over last week around 1:00 A.M., after being clocked at 101 miles per hour. He said he was "speeding to avoid an animal in the roadway."

Police in Florida were chatting with a 28-year-old suspect on Monday, when he suddenly ran and jumped into a river. Two officers tracked him down using paddleboards . . . brought him to shore . . . and arrested him.

A man in Florida was arrested after making MULTIPLE attempts to steal a septic tank from a construction site. Both tries were caught on video

A man in Florida called 911 earlier this month, after his wife fell out of their golf cart and hit her head. Turns out the guy was drunk, and they were coming back from "partying at the club." He was arrested for DUI.

Nippon Life Insurance Company of America filed a federal lawsuit against OpenAI in Chicago, alleging ChatGPT illegally practiced law without a license.

If you watch The Secret Lives Of Mormon Wives you may have heard of protein sodas. Protein sodas blend 10–25g of whey or plant protein with soda-like flavors, offering a tasty alternative to shakes.

Former upstate New York police officer Michael Tapscott pleaded guilty to 40 drug-related charges after admitting he sold prescription drugs while on duty.

Kristina Lyn Tso faces multiple charges after allegedly serving alcohol to minors during a February 28th birthday party in Tooele.

A man in the U.K. was pulled over and busted for driving under the influence of marijuana and possession of cannabis this week. And get this: He was in the middle of taking a driving test at the time.

A 39-year-old woman in Kentucky got arrested after she tried to bail someone out of jail using fake movie money. The bills clearly said they were for "Motion Picture Use Only."

There's a dieting trend on Chinese social media called plastic wrap eating, where people are lining their mouth with plastic cling wrap . . . and then putting food in, chewing it, and spitting it out and tossing it.

A 58-year-old Wisconsin elementary school teacher has been arrested after being accused of using cocaine at school. She admitted to it, but insisted she'd NEVER put her students in danger.

Multiple Olympic medals broke within hours of being awarded during the opening weekend of the Milan Cortina Winter Olympics.

A Jacksonville man faces felony theft charges after stealing nearly $4,000 in meat from two Florida grocery stores.

Surgeons in France discovered a World War One bomb shell inside a patient's rectum. The man had put it there intentionally . . . and officials say he'll be charged with some kind of weapons violation.